


maybe this will work (MaYbE iT wOn'T so leave it alone)

by Anonymous



Category: Naruto
Genre: 'fuck rin help I think I accidentally adopted some brats?, Alternate Universe - Magic, BAMF Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto), BAMF Haruno Sakura, BAMF Hatake Kakashi, BAMF Uchiha Sasuke, BAMF Uzumaki Naruto, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto)-centric, Drabbles, Female Uchiha Sasuke, Gen, HELP ME', I'm not gonna tag 'em all, Not Beta Read, Sporadic Updates, Team bonding through being little shits, What the fuck do I do, a lot of people honestly, as they figure out what they want to be, bc this is just a side work, bc we die like awkward dumbasses who dont know how to ask, do u know how much of a sucker I am for that?, hes not paid enough for this, it seems like, like wtf, lmao poor kakashi, or at all, the answer is a HUGE sucker for that, they all have parents and they're little shits and they're terrible, they just show up to cause headaches, they're not even a fucking team, this is literally just Team 7 causing chaos and headaches, why is it his problem
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-12
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-02-08 12:04:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21475735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Kakashi's life is going to be miserable until he learns to enjoy the four's antics, Sasuke is a Nerd and will happily set things on fire if you ask, Sakura is a strong eleven year old and will happily encourage Sasuke's explosive ideas, Naruto is just Naruto, Sai is an Artist(TM) and doesn't get along with Deidara and Sasori so Team 7 doesn't get along with Deidara and Sasori (except Deidara and Sasuke are kindred spirits who want to blow everything up and so get along), Madara is the King of Petty and therefore untouchable, and everyone else are various levels of Done, Entertained, and Exasperated.Or: Team 7 are literally going to cause the apocalypse if theydon't put that down-Alternatively titled: Sasuke nO, Sakuradon't encourage her,Narutowhy did you agree to Sasuke's ideaand Sai you're supposed to besanestop makingpaper animals that are filled with magic-
Relationships: Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Hatake Kakashi, Dai-nana-han | Team 7/Being Forces of Chaos, Haruno Kizashi & Haruno Mebuki & Haruno Sakura, Haruno Sakura & Hatake Kakashi, Haruno Sakura & Hatake Kakashi & Sai & Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto & Yamato | Tenzou, Haruno Sakura & Sai, Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Yamato | Tenzou, Hatake Kakashi & Namikaze Minato & Nohara Rin & Uchiha Obito, Hatake Kakashi & Sai, Hatake Kakashi & Uchiha Sasuke, Hatake Kakashi & Uzumaki Naruto, Hatake Kakashi & Yamato | Tenzou, Namikaze Minato & Uzumaki Kushina & Uzumaki Naruto, Sai & Uchiha Sasuke, Sai & Uzumaki Naruto, Sai & Yamato | Tenzou, Uchiha Fugaku & Uchiha Itachi & Uchiha Mikoto & Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Obito & Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Sasuke & Uchiha Shisui, Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke & Yamato | Tenzou, Uzumaki Naruto & Yamato | Tenzou
Comments: 10
Kudos: 86
Collections: Anonymous Fics





	maybe this will work (MaYbE iT wOn'T so leave it alone)

**Author's Note:**

> I came up with the system on the fly and decided not to edit it. just accept it

_ "Congratulations, Konoha Academy applicant! You have been accepted into Konoha Academy, School of Magick, and have this first year to decide which branch you shall choose! During your quest to find out which branch you will specialise in, please try to keep school property damage to a minimum._

_"You will be given a three man genin squad, along with a Jonin sensei, in second year. The first year in Konoha Academy is to simply give you time to figure out what you will focus your efforts on becoming once you are second years, along with basic understanding of all branches of Magick. _

_"You will meet with your Teams every day of every other week, because the other weeks are for classes on all subjects, such as Arithmancy, History, Literature, Magical Theory, and Potions, along with whatever other two classes you decide you want to have. The sooner you send in your response, the higher chance there is that you will get the classes you desire._

_"In Konoha Academy, Academy Students are the students who have just started delving into Magick. Genins, the rank above Academy Students, will spend time figuring out what branch of Magick they are interested in, and will be given lessons by their Jonin sensei accordingly._

_"Chunins are students who have a decent understanding on their chosen field of Magick, and will be given lessons that give them a more hands-on and thorough learning approach to expand their knowledge, and will also spend some time with Academy Students to give slightly more in-depth learning material from people who are relatively new to the field themselves. _

_"There are two levels of Jonin: Low level Jonin, and High Level Jonin. _  
  
_"Low Level Jonin are students who thoroughly understand their branch of Magick, and, if need be, could teach others or advise them on the subject accurately. These students spend their time focusing on finding jobs in the Magical community that they would like to have, and try to fulfill all the requirements. It is quite likely that the Academy Teachers are Low Level Jonins who are hoping for a job in teaching and decided to see if they would be good for the job._

_"High Level Jonin, however, are usually young students who have made it to the level of Jonin in their field of Magick, and as such are too young to begin searching for jobs. So they are given the choice of either starting the process over again as Genins and focusing on something else that interests them, become Jonin senseis and teach others about their specific field of expertise, continuing with their apprenticeships, or finishing their apprenticeships and taking on an apprentice of their own._

_"About apprenticeships! Chunins have the choice of staying with their genin team, doing self-study and taking more classes to advance to Jonin level, or applying for apprenticeships with teachers who may accept. In apprenticeships, the student looks for either a Jonin, High or Low, or a Professor who has no apprentice at the moment and is willing to take one on._

_"Students advance ranks with Exams, named after the rank they are trying to achieve, such as 'Genin Exams', 'Chunin Exams', and 'Jonin Exams', which is why it is possible for someone to graduate Konoha with a Genin rank._

_"All students complete eight years, from ages eleven to eighteen, no matter their rank, and will come out of it with thorough understanding of their chosen field(s), and at least basic understanding of the others._

_"If you have any questions, please call Professor Senju, who will undoubtedly have the answer to them all._

_"We await your response eagerly, which will be accepted no later than August 30th, as term starts September 2nd._

_"Thank you for choosing Konoha Academy to become the best Magick user you can be!"_

* * *

"Wow... Dad wasn't kidding when he said this place was huge, 'ttebayo! But I think I'm going to get lost a lot, 'ttebayo." Naruto said, staring up at the castle (yes, okay, he knew it was a _school _but just _look at it) _in awe.

"Oh! Yeah, it really is, don't you think? I think they hand out maps for the Academy Students, though. I hope they do, otherwise I'll never get _anywhere _on time. Plus the staircases and hallways _move around, _and sometimes the hallways want to be doors, so they make themselves look like doors. Don't you think it's weird?"

"Yeah, it's all just so _strange, _'ttebayo!" He shouts, bouncing excitedly on his toes. "Wow, you know a lot about this school, don't you? Are you an Academy Student too? I am! I'm really excited about all this, my parents both went here and they both said they _loved _the school, and now they're both great at what they do, and I'm going to be _even better, 'ttebayo."_ Naruto exclaims, turning around to look at the pink-haired girl who'd replied to him, beaming at her. "I'm going to be the _best.__" _He declares solemnly, leaning forward.

"At what?" The girl asks, looking at him curiously.

"...Well, I don't know _what _yet," Naruto professes sheepishly, scratching the back of his head in embarrassment. "But that's what the first year of this is for, right? Finding out what you're going to do, right 'ttebayo?"

"Yeah!" She says, smiling widely at him. "I want to be _just _like Tsunade-sama."

"She's _so cool, _you know? She revolutionized healing Magick all by herself, and I want to be _just _as good. I've got good control over my Magick, actually, since I can do that leaf exercise thing- that one where you stick a leaf to your forehead and try to not let it fall? Yeah, that! I could do it really well and I'm not sure about walking on water, but I hope I can do that well too because then it means I won't have to spend as much time on my Magick finesse." She rambles, excitedly making hand motions as she talks. 

She opens her mouth again, presumably to keep talking, before looking a bit embarrassed. "Oh, I didn't introduce myself yet, did I? Sorry, I'm Haruno Sakura." Sakura smiles awkwardly at him, her skin flushing lightly.

"It's fine, 'ttebayo! I didn't think to introduce myself either, it's okay! Anyway, I'm Uzumaki Naruto, nice to meet you, Sakura!" Naruto bounces a little on his feet, grinning happily. "Anyway, what was that leaf exercise thing you talked about, 'ttebayo? I haven't done it before. Is it really hard or really easy? Do you think I could get it on my first try, like you did 'ttebayo?"

Sakura lights up, talking animatedly about how it works and how it takes most people a bunch of tries to get it right, before trailing off when she notices Naruto looking like he doesn't understand a word. "Sorry. Sometimes I get a little... enthusiastic." She pauses under a tree, bending down and taking two leaves off the ground, before darting forward to catch up with Naruto.

"All you need to do is put the leaf on your forehead, okay? And then you direct some of your magick to the spot where the leaf is, and then it sticks if you put the right amount of Magick there. See?" Sakura demonstrates, putting a leaf on her forehead and showing how it sticks to the spot, even when she looks down.

"Oh oh oh! My turn now!" Naruto cheers, slapping a leaf to his forehead and shoving his Magick in the general direction of where he wants it to go. 

Of course, since that's way too much Magick, the leaf turns into dust.

"...Did you _burn it?" _Sakura asks incredulously, wide-eyed with shock. And then she catches sight of Naruto's shocked, outraged face and starts giggling uncontrollably, and Naruto pouts pathetically and pulls her along while she laughs.

Eventually Sakura calms down enough to shove her leaf in to Naruto's hand, and she tells him to try again but with less Magick this time, and laughs 'till she cries when all that happens this time is that the leaf flutters to the ground pathetically.

"No! Not like _that. _You either put in too _much _or too _little. _Here, let me show you again." She takes the leaf back and shows him again, and this time can't help but add, smugly, "See? _This _is how you do it, Shannaro!"

Naruto puffs his cheeks out and pouts, and Sakura beams smugly at him.

"Hey, _hey. Naruto." _

"Yeah?" Naruto says, stubbornly not looking at Sakura, and she fights back a wave of giggles, managing to hiss out a quick, _"Wrong way," _without laughing, but gives up when he looks even sulkier, somehow.

"Meanie," Naruto huffs, turning and heading into the place that Academy Students were told to go to, Sakura following while madly smothering giggles and cackling on the inside.

* * *

Sasuke squints up at the ceiling, staring at how it's decorated with many flowering trees, in full bloom even though it's _autumn _outside, and how intricate and hard to pull off it is, and then looks at the buffoon of a man on the stage who had apparently been the creator of such an amazing feat and thinks, _Bull._

However, her cousin Shisui and his older brother Obito are _both _powerful Magick users in their own right who are fools, so she grudgingly admits that she _can _believe that someone like the tanned man at the front who's currently gesticulating wildly _did _make that. But only in her head.

She's jostled out of her thoughts by the pair currently whispering excitedly next to her, the ones she'd been trying to ignore, and she gives her attention to the man for a moment to make sure she isn't missing anything important- "-always! Even when Tobira- oof, sorry, _Professor Senju _said it was madn-" - and then tunes out, instead focusing on the blond and the pinkette's loudly whispered conversation.

"-anyway, Sakura, that's not fair! You've basically got _the best _Magick control ever, so if it takes me a lot longer than it takes _you _it doesn't mean I'm hopeless, 'ttebayo!"

"You keep shredding all the leaves, Naruto! Either that or they don't stick at all. There's no in between _and I don't know why!"_

Sasuke blinks at the pair for a moment, wondering if they're serious, because _yes _her clan _did _have more awareness of Magick than others, and there's a chance that she might be a Magick sensor, but she's standing a bit next to the blond who _keeps jostling her, _and she's been trying her best to ignore them because if she didn't she would pay attention to the blond's- _Naruto's_ \- Magick, she would be overwhelmed with how much Magick he was radiating unconsciously. It was _immense. _He had _gigantic _Magick stores.

But the downside to so much Magick is generally a lack of control. Smaller, less Magick consuming spells were a definite no-no unless the person in question buckled down and concentrated on nothing but Magick control for a good long while, and from how Naruto's attention flitted from object to object, person to person, she was willing to bet he wasn't the type to sit down and just _not move _for hours and _hours._

He seemed to have too much energy for that.

"Well," Sasuke says, interjecting into their conversation without any invitation to do so, but wanting to let them know how idiotic them trying to get him to do something that he won't benefit from is, cringing internally as they both turn to look at her. "he has a lot of Magick, you know? And, it's just that when you have a lot of Magick it's really hard to control it into really small pieces and make them _work. _Which is what the leaf exercise is doing." She blinks at them, debating if she should explain more or leave them to it. "So it's pretty useless for you, so don't bother. You're only going to waste your time if you try." She tells him matter-of-factly, cutting him off when his face contorts into an angry expression. "Tree and water walking would help you a lot more." Sasuke admits, more musing to herself at this point than for the benefit of the other two. 

"Oh, I didn't know that!" Pinky says, a bit awkwardly but in a clear attempt to have her continue the conversation. "Although it makes sense, when you think about it, I guess."

Sasuke looks at the proverbial olive branch, considers, eyes the blonde and the dumbass things he's _one hundred percent __going to do, _and refuses.

At least, she tries. 

It's just that fishcake apparently takes offense to her graciously helping them, and whisper-shouts loudly, "Don't ignore Sakura like that! That's_ rude."_

Huh.

She narrows her eyes at him and bristles, snapping, "Well what do you _want _me to do? I can't exactly _show _you how to tree climb or water walk _here." _She gestures around the room angrily. "Do you _see _any trees to climb? Any water to walk on? Huh?"

That, in hindsight, was a mistake.

But in her defense, she had _literally only just met the guy. _She didn't know _he was actually going to do something so moronic._

Naruto looks around the room, eyeing all the trees twisting their way up the walls. "But there are lots of trees here, right? And aren't we supposed to be learning about Magick anyway? Why not start here, 'ttebayo?" He notices the pools of water around the room and turns them in their direction. "Or we could water walk instead, 'ttebayo!" Naruto whisper-shouts, eyes gleaming excitedly.

"Well, no, you _can't _just go and jump to water walking if you can't even _tree walk. _You won't know the basics!" Sakura says, scowling at the blond.

"Ne, Sakura, but _you _know the basics, right? Why can't _you _teach me, then, 'ttebayo?" 

"Yeah, I know the basics, but you can't just-_Naruto." _Sakura yelps, trying to twist out of his grip on her sleeve.

"More importantly," Sasuke says, kind of annoyed but mostly just bemused at this point, because he reminds her of Obito, a little, so she mostly feels kind of exasperated. "We're in the middle of an assembly?" She gestures vaguely at the general assembly-ness of the assembly. "Which means you can't tree walk or water walk until-"

Sasuke paused, staring at the blond who was climbing up the trees growing up the side of the walls, and promptly turns and ignores him. "What are you doing?" Sakura hisses, grabbing her arm and yanking her back towards Naruto. "We've got to help him!"

"No we don't," Sasuke says immediately, futilely trying to tug her arm out of Sakura's grip, but the other girl has a rather strong hold on her. "If he's being a moron we are in no way obligated to help him," Sakura scowls at her. "I mean, responsibility-wise we don't since we're the same age as him and didn't know he's do something so stupid."

"But-" Sakura starts, subtly steering Sasuke towards Naruto.

"Morally, we might have a duty to help him." Sasuke admits, reluctantly.

"We do!" Sakura insists, forcefully pushing Sasuke in Naruto's direction.

Sasuke digs her heels in futilely, scowling as the other girl (who is, unfairly, a bit taller than her) continues to push her towards the moron, and sags into Sakura's hold, supporting none of her body herself, turning into one hundred pounds of dead weight. 

"...You just want to see him fail." Sasuke mutters, loudly enough for Sakura to hear.

"...I might."

"..."

"..."

"Stop dragging me and we can see how disastrous his attempt is."

Sakura lets her go and they watch Naruto's first attempt at tree-walking. "It's amazing how no one's realized what he's doing yet." Sakura whispers, nudging Sasuke as they watch fishcake use far too little Magick and fall flat on his face.

Sasuke glances at the people around them. In the audience, no one's realized what fishcake is doing, but in the staff... "There are some people who've noticed him," Sasuke murmurs, eyeing the red haired woman who's watching Naruto with amusement, and recognizes her to be Uzumaki Mito. The other dark haired, more sharp-faced woman blinking at Naruto with a small smile on her face and is nudging Mito is...

Sasuke racks her brain for the name. "...Senju Touka," She says, remembering it after a moment of sifting through the other Senju she's heard of. "and Uzumaki Mito."

"Uzumaki?" Sakura asks, sounding a bit surprised and glancing at the staff but not settling on the woman in question.

"Red hair," Sasuke says, and watches Sakura pinpoint her. "why are you so interested?"

"They look alike," Sakura says, and Sasuke considers fishcake and Mito, and can see it, a bit. "And he said his name was Uzumaki Naruto. They have the same surname."

"Oh." Sasuke says, blinking in surprise. "He's a Uzumaki?" _That would explain his large Magick stores, _Sasuke thought, _but it still feels like it's too much, and some of his Magick doesn't feel the same as the rest-_

She's rudely taken out of her thoughts by fishcake exploding through the tree with too much Magick and therefore destroying the room.

* * *

Sasuke wakes up on a couch with someone cuddling her.

She struggles out of the grip-which is _strong-_and tries to remember what happened.

She finally gets out of the grip and drops off the couch, onto the floor, with a _thud _and is immediately treated to bright, eye-searing orange and yellow. She groans, rasping, "Where _am _I?"

"Well, we're in a room," fishcake-Naruto, she remembers-says immediately, his tone quieter than it was before, probably because pinky-Sakura-is just waking up, it seems like.

"I was trying to get up the tree, you know, and then I think I used too much Magick, 'ttebayo-"

"You did, Naruto."

Naruto pauses and grins sheepishly, straightening up and launching himself at his clan member who's just stepped into the room with Madara right behind her.

Sasuke stands up, only to sit back down on the part of the couch Sakura isn't taking up. She eyes the pink haired girl who's groggily waken up and is staring at the room, kind of confused. She prefers Sakura's confusion to Naruto, who's happily yammering at Uzumaki Mito _who's probably supposed to be assigning punishment's or something._

Her thought process must show on her face, because Madara grins at her, and Sasuke _remembers _how he has that exact same grin when he's about to tell someone something they _will not like, _and Sasuke is, like, ninety percent innocent. Eighty. Fifty? She'll take a third of the blame and no more.

"All three of you, your parents are coming to assign the appropriate punishment." He says, and Sasuke really can't figure out why he sounds so gleeful, so she hums and flops on top of Sakura, ignoring the squawk of outrage that comes from it. She's strong. She'll be fine.

"Why?" Sakura asks, voice muffled by the way Sasuke's pressing her into the couch.

"Because we gave Naruto the idea to walk up a tree but then he walked up the trees in the room even though I _said _that was a bad idea-" Sasuke starts, ignoring Sakura's 'no you didn't' by shoving her face deeper into the couch. She pauses, eyes narrowed, and then asks, "_How _much was destroyed?", because she has an idea of where this is going and she _does not like it._

"The entire room." Madara says immediately. "Some of the rest of the building was ruined, too." Mito-san adds on, smiling serenely.

"Wait," Sasuke says, feeling dread grow in her stomach. "Who's coming? Tou-san or-"

"Your mother." Madara says serenely, tucking his hand into the sleeves of his kimono, as if he hadn't destroyed Sasuke's hopes of living to see another day in a second.

Sasuke pales and groans, going boneless on top of Sakura, who very nicely doesn't roll out from under her.

"Is she-"

"Very." Madara hums, blinking at her faux-innocently, like he wasn't the _devil _in disguise.

"...can I get a tomato?" Sasuke asks after a moment, the room filled with Naruto's chatter.

Madara produces one from the sleeves of his kimono and tosses it to her, and she bites into it unhappily.

Naruto quiets down, staring with a mixture of awe and fascination. "That's weird." He says, eyes glued to her just biting into a tomato as if it was an apple, or something.

"Your name is weird, fishcake."

_"Hey!" _

Sasuke ignores him and sullenly eats her tomato.

* * *

(It turns out that her mom did a lot of dumb stuff while she was at school, too, and she passes Sasuke a book full of pranking trips and things that would annoy people but would also help them find out what they're best suited for. 

Her best friend also happens to be Naruto's mother, and they rekindle their friendship when they meet. Sasuke decides she likes fishcake's mom.

Sasuke is going to make everyone's lives _hell. _

But not Madara's because Madara is _petty _and would happily enter a petty war with them and they would _lose. Miserably._

But everyone else? Fair game.)

**Author's Note:**

> my dudes i literally just wrote some shit right now for the purpose of more kakashi being exasperated by team 7 and dear god someone stop me who let me write i have too much power-
> 
> lmao catch me bullshitting some vague half-cooked ideas and stirring it into this mess.
> 
> lmao wtf am i doing i just. WROTE THIS. on a random i d e a oh my god no
> 
> i'll probably like update this out of nowhere for no reason bc this is just to get this idea out
> 
> if someones!actually!reading this!! i commend u for making it through this shitty writing.


End file.
